I am thinking a lot about WW tonight so I am just gonna write about it and see what comes out.
Lately I find myself dreading Wednesday's but also wanting them to get here so badly. I dread them bc I know I have had an unsuccessful weight watchers week in the food department. But I want them because I want that fresh start. I want to hopefulness that comes from a new week.
And I keep starting strong-ish and then falling down.
I think I am going to try a new approach. I want to say I will try starting Wednesday but why not try it tomorrow? I am going to pretrack for the week. Or at least for each day. I will have everything in my tracker and if I want to or need to vary from this, I will have to think that much harder about it.
I have four pounds to loose. Four freaking measly pounds. I have lost fifty eight pounds, and here I am approaching my goal. Every time I have approached a goal or milestone on weight watchers (ESP the fourth and fifty pound mile maker), I have struggled. I take weeks to loose a pounds, then gain it back to loose it again and eventually bust through and don't look back. I cannot figure out what it is about these milestones that make me struggle. What is happening? I know what is happening physically. I am eating what I want and not really tracking. Or eating it and tracking but just making poor choices and then getting discouraged. I cannot figure out the mental side of this.
As soon as I typed that, I cannot help hit think about the meeting I had with Linda, my WW leader, back in October. I was telling her I couldn't do something and she said stop saying that. You CAN.
I just need to channel that during these last pounds. I can do this. I deserve to do this.
As I think more, I think about a conco I had with Pam about how I was worried I would get to my goal weight before Vegas. And then have to maintain while in Vegas. And in our conversation I was not confident I could do that. I think I am stopping myself from even having the opportunity to try. What are the other options I have in Vegas of I am not maintaining? To gain? To loose? Sure one of those would be so freaking easy. And one would be hard. But I have come this far. I need to believe that I can do this. I can be successful in Vegas.
So is that what this mental block is? I dunno. But it's something to think about!
Alright I think I am all tapped out of thoughts regarding WW for tonight. Good night all.